$ 30 Days of Truth- Day 9 & 10!

WOW. So these past two days have been crazy hectic!! Yesterday, I was on a conference call, and my mother was outside with my kids. The next thing I hear is screaming and crying from B. I had to mute and run. My dear mother, let him ride his new big boy bike, off of the curb (with no helmet) and he busted it! He must have turned the wrong way, I don't know, I was inside. And he face planted the concrete, got his eye, chin, nose, knee, even took off his shoe and ripped his sock! But mommy came to the rescue and gave lots of hugs, kisses, peroxide, neosporin, and spongebob band aids. He is much better now, still looks rough, but better.  But on a great note, 'B's Birthday is tomorrow, AND hubbs ordered me an edible images printer last night!!!!!  And my at home job will start Monday!!! SO HAPPY!  Sad though because my baby, is turning 5 Friday, time goes by WAY TOO FAST. :( On to the 30 Days of Truth:

Day 9- Someone, who I couldn't let go, but just drifted.

This is a hard one.... I am not sure. If we drifted, then obviously our friendship/relationship didn't mean enough. And if I couldn't let them go, I wouldn't hae. Maybe my best friend Nick. One time he was dating a female, that I did not care for, and we got into a HUGE argument and didn't speak for months! Of course, I WAS RIGHT, lol (don't go there), and they broke up and we started to speak again. That's really the only one I can think of..... Sorry it wasn't super juicy! :)


Day 10- Someone I need to let go, or wish I had never met.

Now this one might be a smidge juicy, hubby is NOT going to like this, but here goes.
Mine is not the someone I need to let go, it is the someone, I wish I had never met.
His name is Adam. I met him one night at the Wal-Mart, he was helping me load a desk into my car, and we just hit it off. I was broken up, from my now hubby for the one millionth time, so I was ecstatic to be "moving on". It was great, he was super sweet and hot, and was just fun to be with. We never became "BF/GF", it wasn't like that, per say.

  It eventually came down to him or my hubbs. I was so torn, and I didn't know who to choose..... Adam, didn't really want a GF at the time, or anytime soon, but he would have made his way there with me.(I just couldn't picture myself married to him). Hubbs, wanted me then, and always (I knew I could marry this one, and have children with him, and be with him forever). So I chose my hubbs! I was happy with my choice. Although being a stupid teenager, I still spoke to Adam and lied to my hubbs about it, and this put a rift in our relationship. We had many fights over this character and so many bad things seemed to follow. So, although my time with Adam was fun, I still wish I hadn't have met him, it wrecked my relationship for awhile with the hubbs.

  I am glad that I have grown up and no longer act this way. Stupid teenagers, lol. I would never change this for anything, although we went through some crappy and horrible days after this, I still would have chosen my hubbs. To me, it was never, a choice.

30 Days of Truth- Day 8

Day 8- Someone who made your life hell.

  This person, I hate to say, was my twin sister. She really was a complete jerk to me, she thought she was cooler, prettier, and better than me. I love her, and we didn't get along very well, but good enough. She hated me. I don't know why, but she did. I remember getting into physical altercations with her, and my mom yelling, "Don't break anything or kill each other!!!" Thanks mom. :) Never have I been in a physical fight with ANYONE, only my sister. Strange. Twins are supposed to love one another, and have the bond, that is unspeakable. THAT IS NOT US. She was mean to me, and I was mean to her.

  When she moved out, (while I was in the hospital after a car wreck), she got anything and everything she wanted! Talk about favoritism. It stunk. She still does. My grandmother pays her credit cards, her rent, got her a brand new suv, pays for her multiple plane rides home, trips, anything. I remember, one time I called my grandmother and asked her if she could help me pay for a root canal, and she didn't have the money. Then my sister gets a boob job?!?! REALLY?!?! LIKE, I WANT A ROOT CANAL?!?!?! NO. ugh. So, this is how it is. She still gets whatever she wants.

  She's designer, I am vintage. She is labels, I'm whatever matches my style, she's materialistic and gorgeous,  I don't care, LOL. Anywho, this is my person. We are trying to get along better, but she trys to make everything about her, when it isn't necessary. She "came down here to see my son for his birthday", yet pitched a fit b/c she had to drvie over here. She wanted me to get his gift, so she didn't have to carry it on the plane, they didn't have it, So I asked her to look. Guess who DIDN'T get a birthday present?!?! ugh. Anywho.

30 Days of Truth Day 7- And I have been tagged!!!

Day 7- Someone who has made your life worth living for.

I would have to say...... probably my husband. If it weren't for him, I wouldn't have my beautiful children, the funny in life, a best friend, or a loving companion. So for that, I thank him, and love him dearly. We have been through our severe ups and downs, and in the end, here we stand together. I love you baby! I look forward to 80 more years of funny, happy, sexy, lovey-dovey moments with you!

Now on to the tagging!! I was tagged today by a beautiful, sexy, hilarious, mama!! Jana over @ Boobies, Babies, and a Blog, has tagged me with 8 questions to answer.


 Heres the drill, I will answer the 8 questions she came up with, then I tag 8 others and ask them 8 questions! Sound easy enough?! It is! :)

Here are my answers for hers:

If you could change one thing about your personality, what would it be?

It would be how sarcastic I can be sometimes.... Sometimes I am too sarcastic and it comes off rude.
What was the last argument you had regarding?
Too be frank, it was about sex. I feel I don't get it enough, lol. I have the sex drive of a 16 year old boy!
Do you read while you're in the bathroom?
Sometimes! It helps to keep my mind off of other things!
Do you believe sex offenders can be rehabilitated?
I want to say yes, to an extent, but I don't think so.
Did you have a good childhood?
I'd say I had a GREAT childhood, other than the beatings I got from my dad, it was delightful!


Fill in the blank: Money can't buy you _Pure Happiness_.

What is the last lie you told?
I told my mom I was trying to make it in time to get her, I wasn't. I was training for a job with a friend, and we talked more than trained, and I wasn't in a huge hurry. Sorry.
What's one thing (people and pets excluded) that you cannot live without?
Ice Tea and Texas Pete Hot Sauce!
Tell me 3 things you ALWAYS buy at the grocery store?
Fruit Snacks
Bubble Bath
Dr. Pepper
 
My 8 question for my 8 friends below:
 

1. If you could be a fruit, which would you be, and why?
2. Have you ever had a one night stand?
3. If you could have plastic surgery, no matter what the cost, what would you get?
4. Cats or Dogs?
5. What would be your last meal, if you knew, you were going to die the next morning?
6. What kind of car do you drive?
7. Would you ever bungee jump or base jump?
8. What is your talent?

 
 
 
 
Now on to my 8 dolls of choice:
Food Floozie
J~ @ Babies, Boobies, and a Blog
Duane Scott
Mommy the Coupon Hunter
Peace.Love.Lipgloss-- http://brandiefleming.blogspot.com/
Southern Cinderella
That 22 Year Old Housewife
Nikki @ You're My Cuppy Cake
 
 

$ 30 Days of Truth-- Day 6

Day 6-- Something you hope you never have to do.

• I hope I never have to go through the pain, my aunt did, and bury a child. This is my greatest fear.
• I hope I never have to go through a divorce.
• I hope I never have to hear the words: Cancer, Alzheimers, or anything else that might affect my family in a tragic sense.

I know this is more than one, but I have a lot of worries and fears, I will worry myself to death sometimes!! geez. Stupid Anxiety. :) My cousin passed away when I was 15-16 and I was devestated. He was my favorite, and we were so much alike, he was one of my best friends. We hung out a lot, especially, after he moved closer to where I was living. My grandparents would tell me how much a like we acted, this was NOT a compliment at the time. LOL. We were rebellious and had our own minds, and did what we felt was right, even if it wasn't. I miss Andrew so terribly, I can only imagine, how my aunt foo-foo feels.

Andrew is in 'The Gap' shirt.

30 Days of Truth- Day 5

Day 5- Something you hope to do in your life.

I hope to do a few things in life actually. Here is my list:

• Raise great christian children/adults, possibly future leaders, smart and happy. (I would say independent, but in some selfish way, I hope they will always need me for something)
• Stay married til the end.
• Adopt a child one day.
• OWN MY OWN BAKERY!
• Just be happy.

This is a short and to the point list, I feel like my last 2 days of truth, were miserably long. Sorry. :)

30 Days of Truth- Day 4 & Friday Blog hops!

Day 4- Something you have to forgive someone for. (This story will jump all over the place & its long.)

  This is a sad subject for my family.
My hubby probably does not wish for me to share this, but it is 30 days of TRUTH, and this is the truth. When I was pregnant with our son, 'B', my husband was working at a tattoo shop. He had decided to try Cocaine, and became addicted, I did not find any of this out for a year and a half. He was acting weird, and distant, and was always picking fights. We would have some awful fights, over nothing, it was like he was picking fights with me. And of course, we would fight and scream and yell, and he would leave. This went on for awhile. He wouldn't eat and he always had "headaches and stomach aches". Stupid me never caught on, why, because I assumed he would have never done that to me.

  We moved out into our own house, he wasn't making great money, but decent. I made him quit the tattoo shop, because we were having a baby, he didn't need to work in that environment. And he got a job at a tire shop, making ok money, enough to move out. My mom moved in with us and we were all living together. The bills were split ,and I remember not being able to pay bills, but yet he made enough money to do so. I was so confused, why isn't the power on? Where is the gas? What is going on? I always got, slow week, didn't make that much. OK. So, I will get a job. "NO, your job is here raising our son".

  So, I stayed home. We still fought, it got so bad, he would leave for days and I wouldn't know where he was. One day he called me, crying and upset, and finally told me he was in Savannah (6 hours from here) and he had been doing drugs. I was shocked! Kind of. I knew something was up, it had to of been drugs, or he was cheating. But I knew something wasn't right. So, he quit. Or so I thought. We were ok for about 2 weeks, then it was back to the same, he was blaming me for not trusting him. I had 'B' during all of this and he was ok for a little bit, then it was right back to it.

  I was so depressed, fighting all of the time, never seeing him. Poor baby, I hated this for him, he didn't know. But I did. One day, he decided to go to his dads, and try to get better. HAHAHA. What a joke! He was doing drugs WITH his dad, and on top of that, he changed his passwords for everything. I was infuriated, if you hae nothing to hide, why did you change all of it?! Got into it one day, heard a voicemail from a girl, who "had a great time last night". THAT WAS IT. I let him have it. I am not taking this crap anymore. The gas was shut off, and it was winter, and I had a new baby. He called his mom and they bought us a hotel room for the night, but not without first laying into us, and letting us know that she would call DFCS. Are you kidding me?!?!

  I am thinking all is fine, bills are paid and here he is spending it all on drugs! How dare you!? I am a great mother! So. Things were rocky between everyone for awhile. I decided he had to go, didn't care where, just not here with us. Well, one day I came home, and SURPRISE! My 2 digital cameras were gone, a Tv, A dvd player, and some other things. Someone broke into our house?!  NO. HE got into the house through, the garage door, and stole and pawned these things for drug money. UGH!!! I HATE YOU! How could you do this to me?!?!? To our son?!?! He moved in with his mom, & my mom, B, and I moved out. (His mom thought she had magical powers, and that she could heal him, since I was the one corrupting him.)

  We got a 2 bedroom apartment and started over. I was working, and had 'B' in daycare, and took my mom back and forth to work. It was stressful. Some days I was so depressed, I couldn't get off of the couch. My mom had to feed my son, because I couldn't do it. It was so sad. I would call him everyday, 10x a day, he didn't want anything to do with us. He was made to get a job, and I asked him to help buy diapers and food, his mom didn't think he had to do that. I hated her too. One day, he screwed up, and his mom kicked him out. And of course, he stayed with a guy, he was doing drugs with.

   Well I packed all his crap up and drove the hour and a half to his place of residence, and tried to drop it off. He wasn't there, and the stupid woman wouldn't let me leave it with her, dummy. So then she came at me, while I was on the phone with HIS mom, and so his mom called the cops. I left. To make the night even worse, I was pulled over, found out my license was suspended (I assumed the ticket was paid), and almost taken to jail. GREAT. Thankfully though, the police officer who pulled me over, was the one that was called to the house. He knew how bad of a night it had been, and he let me go, but someone had to drive me all the way home. At this point, I was done. I didn't call anymore, I didn't let 'B' leave messages, I didn't care.

   I moved on. I started hanging out with my friends, and spending so much time with 'B', and enjoying life. His mom called me one day and told me he called her. He told her, "He couldn't do it anymore, and he loved me and 'B', and he wanted to go to rehab". She took him the next day. I was relieved, yet, not getting my hopes up. Went and saw him one day and he looked so good. So much better, he was ecstatic to see me and 'B', he couldn't stop hugging and kissing us. This was refreshing to me, I missed that. Well finally his time was done, and he came home. Then he dropped the bomb on me. We were moving. Wait, what?! I don't even trust you yet, and you want me to move an hour and a half way from my family?

  Call me stupid, but I did it. BEST. DECISION. EvER. We got our own apartment, and things were great! It took a long time for me to trust him again, and I checked in on him at work, and went through his phone, wallet, anything I had to. And, he wasn't lying or hiding anything from me, and slowly things were better. Here we are today, married, 2 kids, gorgeous house, he works for the state, and I stay home. And life couldn't be better. He will be 4 years sober next April!!!

   I love him with everything I have, and we have been through SO much, I have NO doubt we will be married for forever. I love you baby, and thank you for all that you do. Thank you again for choosing us and deciding to get sober. I adore what we have, and am very happy! Oh yes, I had forgiven him, but somewhere in the back of my mind, I don't completely. Maybe its just a way to stay aware, and on my toes, and know that it could change at any moment. I am trusting it won't, but I can't see the future, I can just hope and pray for the best.

30 days of truth- Day 3

Day 3-  Something you have to forgive yourself for.

  Wow, there are so many things that I beat myself up for. Only one really came to mind and stuck. NO JUDGING, if you do not agree with what I am about to tell you, Please do not tell me.
When I was 16, my boyfriend and I (now my husband) got pregnant. We were in NO place to have a baby, I didn't have a job, he was working for his dad. I was living with my mom and grandfather at the time, NO WAY, could I have had that baby. First of all, my dad would have literally killed me, my family would have disowned me. Not pretty. I love my family, I never wanted to disappoint them. it just happened. Now keep in mind, we were having protected sex, and I was on birth control.

  Come to find out, something failed. So, there I was, stuck. What should I do? My mom asked me if we were having sex, of course I said NO, and then stupid me had to tell her a week later I was prego. That sucked! HAHA. I did not tell him. I know, horrible. But I felt it was my decision, my choice, my body. Besides, who knew what he was going to say, and I didn't wanna hear it. So, off to the clinic I went. I received some counseling, and some meds. You can see where this is going. For those of you who care, I was literally 3 weeks prego when I did this. And to be 100% honest, I was fine with the decision I had made. It was hard, especailly for a 16 year old, and for one who has always wanted a family. Just not then.

   I fought with myself back and forth over this whole mess. It was heart-breaking and brutal. And you cannot judge someone, about something they did, until you have been in their shoes. I just want to say that never again would I do this, I now know, all children are children of God. The pain was unspeakable. I told him that I had to have it done b/c it was in my tubes. He felt awful, but relieved, I believe. But to this day, I still wonder sometimes, what if. And don't worry, he foudn out the truth, and we didn't speak for a couple days. But, knowing what all I have been through now, there's NO WAY, I could have gone through that with a child. But that is another story.

30 Days of Truth- Day 2 & The Naughty List

Day 2: Something you love about yourself.

I adore the fact that, at any moment, I can be spontaneous and crazy. I also adore the fact that I am a PHENOM baker, I really don't know who I got it from, maybe my grandmother on my dads side. Either way, I enjoy my body sometimes as well. Not the fat parts I complained about in Day 1. My eyes! I love the fact that I am so open-minded, about anything! I love how I am not afraid to speak up, and I dare someone (even my hubby, who wouldn't dare) walk all over me! I tell it like it is, I am a realist, like it or not, I will tell you the truth.

Now on to the naughty list:

1) I went through the U-Scan and someone put $5 bills in the $1 bill slot, and I got $20 back, instead of $4. :) NO judging!

2) My daughter had pringles off of the floor for breakfast one day! She pulled the can out of the pantry before I got up, and spilled them on the living room floor. So, there you go.

3) Sometimes I pour Pine-Sol into the sinks and toilets, and flush/rinse, just so it smells like I cleaned! LOL. No judging! I am a busy person, I don't have all day to clean! :)

Follow me back Tuesday & 30 Days of Truth-

Well you guys know that today is Tuesday, which means, time to head on out to the Tuesday blog hops! Also, I was over on Jana's page (BBAB) and she has started the '30 days of Truth' over at Angel Believes. Well, I was so in, the questions are great! Here is a link if you would like to join in!

Day 1- Something you hate about yourself.

Yes, hate is a strong word, but we all use it.
I know it says 'something', as in 1, but I have a few
.
I hate the way I look. Honestly. I used to weigh 87 pounds at 21 years of age, since I have had kids, I now weigh 138. This to me is unacceptable. And I know some of you reading this are like, "I would kill to weigh that!" But its true, this to me is fat and ugly, and I do not like it. I do not wish to weigh 87 pounds again, honestly, I see photos of myself from a mere 4 years ago, and I look TOO thin. Maybe 110.

I have panic attacks. And some are controllable and some are not. Mainly if I am out of my comfort zone, and not around anyone I know, I wig. If I am at home alone for longer than an hour and I can't get in touch with someone, I wig. I think I am going to die or something bad will happen, and no one will find me for days. I have this fear of that happening and my poor child would be here with a dead body for days. Although, my hubby comes home at 6:30, lol, I just have that fear. This is why my mom lives with us, and the fact she has nowhere else to go. Silly, probably even crazy, but that's me.

Also, I am a screamer (Just like Jana, lol), and in the same way. I scream when I am angry. I feel bad because my dad used to abuse me and my sister when we were younger, and so I just feel guilty for screaming. I just say, well I would rather scream then spank them. And this isn't an everyday occurrence, but trust me, we have our moments in this house.

I do not like to go places that are 15 miles or more away from my home. I am horrible with directions, I can manage around the town, and into the adjoining cities. But if I have to get on the highway to go anywhere, someone better be with me. I get lost in .02 seconds and I will wig, lol. My husband says I'm directionally challenged, this is why I love him so much, he is a highway-direction-map superman!

Well that's it.... tomorrow will be Day 2 for me and the question is: Something you love about yourself.
I have posted a page of the questions if you would like to follow along! Just check it out under my header.

Monday Minute!

 It is that joyful time again, we like to call, MONDAY. Over at The Daily Dose, Ian is doing his usual awesomeness, and this 'episode' is co-hosted by Kendra from Baby Bits! By the way, she came up with all of the questions!

What was your "oh no, I'm turning into my Mom/Dad" moment?


        There are so many moments, I can't place a finger on just one, gahhh. Mainly with most things I say on a daily basis, there are those that creep out, that sound like my parents! Saying something is different than turning into something. Please Lord, I WILL NOT turn out like my mother. BAHAHA.

  What current commercial do you find the most annoying/funny?Most annoying commercial? Not sure, I have been using my dvr, so it is hard to know. I did see one the other day where I about fell out laughing, but now, I can't remember. dang.



If you could only eat one color food for the rest of your life what would it be?
Are cupcakes considered a color? LOL. Probably white or brown..... Brown for tea, chocolate, lots of things!


What is your current Facebook/Myspace/Twitter status?
FB: Something about wanting to create cookies.
Myspace: HA! Don't use it ever.
Twitter: Something about my kids, I think.




'F***', Marry, Kill from this list below. Women pick from the men, men pick from the women.


•Snookie (from Jersey Shore), Ellen DeGeneres, Betty White
•Regis Philbin, Justin Bieber, Perez Hilton

Ok, I would probably Marry Regis, he is just so charming!
I would probably 'F' Justin Bieber, lol, young I know, but Regis is too old and well perez?! yuck.
And I would hafta off Perez! LOL. He is an annoying D*uc*ebag!!

And if I were a man, lol, I would Marry Betty White, 'F' Ellen, and kill Snookie!!! :) Just f.y.i. ;)